Listmania: How to Survive Two Kids - Life with a Newborn and a Toddler

When I was pregnant with my second child, I spent a lot of time trying to wrap my head around the logistics of parenting two children at two very different stages of life. It's amazing how much a couple years between kids can mean a world of variation in needs, schedules, meals, preferences, abilities...the list goes on and on. I searched the internet trying to find advice from moms who had been there, but found there really was a shortage of practical information that I could put to use. I am starting this post 7 months into my life with two kids, and though I'm sure it is different for everyone, I think I have a perspective that can hopefully help others out there who are wondering how the heck they will get through this part of parenting. Maybe this will help...

Surviving Two Kids - Life with a Newborn and a Toddler

1. If you still have time before your second child arrives, do some preparation. I'm not talking about setting up the crib - I'm talking about sanity preparation. Start talking to your toddler about the new baby, and include terms like, "patience" and "fragile". 
2. Get your hands on as many big sibling books that you can find - we found "I'm a Big Sister" (brother version also available), as well as "Waiting For Baby" and "You and Me". These all show what life with a new baby will be like and should help immensely once the baby comes home.
3. Start stockpiling quiet toys that can be kept in special bins throughout your house. These can be used by your toddler during baby naptimes, nursing sessions, or when Mom just needs 15 minutes of silence (or almost silence anyway). Include items like books to read, crayons and coloring books, or quiet books (here's my version). To make the boxes even more exciting, only let your toddler use them when you need the quiet time.
4. Keep emergency items all over the place. I have a gallon-size ziploc in my car, my husband's car, and in my way-too-big-to-be-trendy purse. In these bags I have a will-not-be-missed change of clothes for each kid, a diaper for each kid, wipes, a disposable changing pad and a disposable diaper trash bag. At this point I do still use a diaper bag, but it stays in the car and I just pull things from it when I need too.
5. I always keep the following in my purse: A toddler-applicable snack. Stickers and crayons. An old (hopefully charged) smartphone loaded with whatever is the latest and greatest area of interest. I promise you will get caught somewhere, or need to buy some extra toddler happiness when the baby needs attention while you are running errands. A box of raisins always makes my older daughter happy when I need an extra 20 minutes to get everyone through a doctor appointment.
6. Solicit your toddler for help with the baby. This has been huge for us, and Bugga loves to feel important. Even at 2.5 she is able to bring me things like a baby blanket, a clean outfit for the baby, etc. if I just ask her. 
7. Grocery shopping with one kid was a breeze compared to two. In case you didn't learn this the first time around, your baby's car seat DOES NOT go on top of the shopping cart. Ever. And unless you are at Costco, the car seat will likely not fit inside the cart either, especially if you plan on actually shopping for anything, and definitely if your toddler is sitting in the kid seat. This is where the sling/baby carrier serves its purpose. Oh, and don't forget to park right next to the cart return.
8. Speaking of the baby carrier...that thing will come in handy a lot. I wore it all over the house. So did my husband, as for awhile that was the only place Bella would nap. (We do not miss those days AT. ALL.) I also wore it a lot outside of the house - besides shopping, it allowed me to still keep Bugga enrolled in her gymnastics class. She isn't quite old enough for a non-parented class, but I can't have the baby in the infant seat while Bugga is in class. But the sling was no big deal. And Bugga really needs that gymnastics class for a myriad of reasons, so I am so glad I did not have to suspend that from our schedule.
9. If your toddler doesn't use a sound machine, I would consider it at this point. My kids both have sound machines which are priceless tools when both at home and traveling. And now that you will have a new baby potentially screaming at all hours, a sound machine can muffle that sound so at least SOMEONE in your house can get some sleep.
10. Know that this chaotic mess of a life will not last forever. There will be tears of happiness and frustration several times over as you learn to adjust to everything. That first year of your child's life is HARD on a mom. And add a second (or third, or fourth) kid to it, and everything escalates. But your family will evolve into something that works for everyone.

*Note: For some reason I wrote this post and never published it, and I just found it now that my second child is 14 months old. I am happy to say we survived the first year (as you will) and things are definitely easier nowadays that we all know each other much better and have adjusted to life outside the womb. Hang in there!

Listmania: What We're Reading (1 Year Old)

Literally drooling over her book!

Bella just REALLY started getting into her books. Her primary way to "play" is to pick a book, come over to you, turn around and sit as close to you (or on you - LOOK OUT MOM HERE I COME style) as possible and get ready for you to read to her. Bella's little hands will touch the pages and point to the pictures, help you turn the page, lift flaps and all the other activities that come with great books for this age.

Here are some of the titles we are currently reading and re-reading:

1.) Dear Zoo by Rod Campbell. This book says it has been around for 30 years, but I hadn't heard of it until someone gifted me this book when I was pregnant with my second. My 13-month-old loves opening the flaps to reveal the different animals that the zoo is sending. It's simple so it offers just enough words to provide a story without losing your child's interest.

2.) Peekaboo Kisses by Barney Saltzberg. Both my daughters have loved this book at this age. Both react very enthusiastically by giving each animal big slobbery kisses and hugs as we turn each page. And there's other activities like "squeaking" the mouse and feeling the different "furs" of the animals.

3.) Curious George at the Zoo by H. A. Rey. Another touch-and-feel book with a simple storyline. Bella is already quick to point out where the monkey is hiding in each scene.

4.) Hello, Bugs! by Smriti Prasadam This is a great book from birth until whenever. It's mostly black and white so it's supposed to be great for babies who are just developing their eyesight. My daughter wanted this read to her just about every day (and many many times a day) for about two straight months before she realized there were other books in the world. She likes the sound effects we make for each bug and the shiny parts of the artwork that catch her eye.

5.) Hugs for You by Paula Hannigan. This was a gift from a friend, and both daughters love it. And this one, like Peekaboo Kisses, is also covered with big slobbery kiss marks from both of my girls loving it too much. It's a sweet and simple read.

6.) The Very Hungry Caterpillar by Eric Carle. Of course. This is indeed a classic we all know plenty about. I don't remember my first daughter getting too into this one, but Bella is currently on a caterpillar obsession. The book encourages her to turn pages on her own with the various size pages. I like that it teaches you that you can eat all sorts of junk food and it will likely make you sick, and that a nice healthy salad (of a leaf) will make you feel all better again. Oh, and that big is beautiful too! Love all the subtle messages in this one.

7.) Slide and Find ABC by PriddyBooks. This isn't so much a story book, but it doesn't stop Bella from carrying it around. It has a built in handle too, so this larger-than-average book is easy to bring with you from room to room. It's obviously educational from an alphabet perspective, and my daughter loves the sliding windows that reveal more pictures.

8.) Tubby by Leslie Patricelli. There are various books with the baby character that are super simple and very cute. I discovered this series right as Bugga was around 2, so I was hesitant to buy these since it starred a baby and I didn't want her to identify with younger behavior. At this point though we also have Huggy Kissy and Fa La La La La and Bella loves the unexpected mild chaos that comes with every story.

9.) Pet the Bear and His Alaskan Friends by Pam Clifton. We obtained this one during the four months we lived in Anchorage, Alaska when Bugga was just under one year old. After looking for a link to this book online and finding only a random option to purchase, I imagine if you are reading this you might not bother pursuing this one. BUT it is cute and is part of our family's story so I am still including it in this list. It has simple and cheerful pictures of Alaskan animals, and some tactile textures for a baby to touch as well. And gives my older daughter a distant memory of her brief time in a unique place.

10.) The Bunny Rabbit Show by Sandra Boynton. I love all the Sandra Boynton books and my older daughter has most of her books. Somehow I missed this one (and after looking for the link I see why - it just came out a few months ago!) so I picked it up for #2. BOTH girls (3-year-old included) love this book, but I am sure that a lot of it has to do with the way you read it: you need to make up a melody for the lyrics of the story. A lot of her books are like this, and I think it adds to the fun of reading it. I also get a kick out of hearing my husband (or anyone else) come up with their own version of the tune.

What are your 1-year-olds reading?

Nursery Room Reveal

I recently posted the ideas I used for inspiration when putting together my second daughter's nursery. Well, here is how it all turned out!

I ended up using a turquoise, white and silver palette with a baroque/damask (uhhhhyeahhhh to be honest, I don't know the difference!) and butterfly theme (I was unable to choose one or the other so just went with BOTH!). I tried to tie in the design across the different details so it ended up flowing pretty well.

Let me give you a tour!

Starting from the left of the door I put Bella's changing table and the glider that I have had since pregnant with Bugga. The glider doesn't exactly match, but I was not about to buy another glider just to get it to match the room. I toss baby blankets on it all the time anyway. 

Do you know what drove the color? The curtains. I wanted (NEEDED) some quality blackout curtains, and I found an Etsy designer that offered an excessive amount of fabric patterns. This one I found is perfect for what I was looking for. Then, I spray-painted an IKEA mirror to match the turquoise color in the curtains. I also ordered a matching changing table cover and boppy cover from another Etsy store. In between the mirror and the curtains is my burst of butterflies. 

Here is another view that includes the boppy cover - the fabric is super soft.

And perhaps a slightly closer view of my butterfly installation. I like calling it an installation, you know, because I'm a museum-level arteest and all.

I was going for a "just released" effect and love the multiple dimensions of the butterflies since the wings come out from the wall, and they are scattered all over multiple walls and the ceiling.

Moving to the other side of the room, you can see the crib and bookshelf. This will be the second baby to sleep in this crib that I love. I continued the butterfly theme with the butterfly mobile over the crib, and the butterfly framed rhinestone piece on the bookshelf. I found some ornate frames to match the feel of the curtains and the mirror, spray-painting them to match the room, and lucked out finding drawers/doors to work with the IKEA bookshelf, as well as some turquoise toy bins. I also purchased some silver damask decals that run up the wall over the bookshelf, as well as up the wall right next to the door. I made Bugga a pink striped pillow poof so she'd have some place to sit and play while I nurse her little sister in the glider during the day when it's just the three of us at home.

Here's a closer look at the butterfly mobile I made.

And a closer (yet blurry, sorry) picture so you can see the rhinestone detail of the framed butterfly. 

Here's a straight-on view of the bookshelf and the coordinating decor. I painted the frames, and the mats, and modified some prints to fit my vision after seeing a variety all over the internet.

I forgot to take pictures of the closet and door wall, but all that's interesting from that view is the silver damask decal that is slightly different than the one over the bookshelf.

I really enjoyed decorating this room, and I truly enjoy just being in it now - it is so relaxing. I'm also proud of how everything turned out! After all is said and done, I made/customized so much of it myself:

• the mirror
• the butterfly installation
• the striped pillow poof
• the butterfly mobile
• the frames, mats and prints
• the butterfly framed rhinestone art

I hope to post additional details on how I made each of my crafts and will link from here as they become available. And now that we have moved 4 months into Bella's life and I've had to recreate this room in an entirely new house, I will also post updated photos on the variation of the design once I get all of it set back up (and reordered where applicable - darn non-reusable decals!). I hope you enjoyed your tour!

Also, if you want to check out Bugga's 2-year-old room, click here!

And just like that...

We are moving back to Texas! After what has been one of the longest winters on record (at least according to all the Calgarians I keep talking to) we are leaving just as it finally stops snowing...and then just in time for the sticky triple-digits of Houston.

Seriously - I JUST posted my toddler's room reveal and WHAM I have to take it all down. And I haven't even shown you what I did with my newborn's nursery yet! I'm planning to just recreate the same designs in the new house so I will do an update post as well. I will need to reorder a lot of the decals since they weren't reusable (ugh, what a waste!) but they are so much easier than painting. I say they were a waste because I know for a fact there are reusable decals available (I found some for the girls' bathroom) even though they look great, but they are hard to find.

Anyway, so we are currently trying to survive between homes. We had a disastrous week last week in a hotel in Calgary as our house was packed and cleaned, and now we are in corporate housing until our furniture gets to town. I say disastrous because as much as we were SO very fortunate to stay in a two-bedroom suite with a toddler and a baby, NOBODY slept all week, naps, nights, whatever. The baby was up every 2 hours, the toddler decided she couldn't stay in her bed even though we set everything up PERFECTLY...and I was a ZOMBIE!

The crazy thing is I had been dreading our four-hour flight down (Bella's first flight) and made massive preparations as far as entertainment for Bugga, packing perfectly, etc. and it ended up being the easiest flight in the history of parenting. At least for this family.

And things have only improved since we landed. Our corporate housing apartment complex has three bedrooms (win), a playground (win), and a splash pad (super win). And Bella is just coming out of a growth spurt which means she's slept 8 plus hours the past few nights, allowing me to gain a little of my sanity back.

I think the spurt's over though so tonight could be back to 2 feeds a night which isn't awesome but tolerable...and soon we get to start solids so that might improve things as well.

Anyway, time to get back into the swing of things here - YEE-HAW! Yeah.

Easter Egg-tivities

I had great plans for Easter this year as far as toddler activities go. Then my newborn started sleeping (or rather NOT sleeping) even more horribly, and my husband needed to go out of town for work for the third time in four weeks. So basically most of this past week leading up to the Easter Bunny's visit is now a bit of a blur.

Somewhere in there I managed to put together two brain cells on occasion to find some activities for Bugga to do that were Easter-related. I found some great printable activities online that were both Easter-relevant as well as educational, but not too old for her as a lot of Preschool printables tend to be.

Here's Bugga working on the Egg Matching Activity, which she shocked me by immediately being a whiz at. This explains why her strongest skill with folding laundry is matching her socks!

Here's the Carrot Activity that involves Bugga trying to figure out which big letter matches which little letter. This was a new way of thinking about the letters, as we have not really introduced "little" letters yet. This was our introduction.

These printable activities can be found here.

And of course, I planned to get in some egg decorating. We had a great time last year when Bugga was 15 months old so of course I was optimistic. I saw an adorable idea online that involved rolling the eggs in polenta - I had planned on using colored coconut - but that was a massive fail. The "egg wash glue" was not at all a glue so it was just a big mess. Apparently I forgot the sugar, which, logically is the sticky part. Oops.

While we were waiting for the eggs to dry to see if the coconut would stick, my toddler got impatient with the waiting, so I improvised with some plastic eggs and a glue gun.

Once I knew that the textured eggs weren't happening this year, I washed off the remaining coconut, and just went with the infamous drop-in-the-colored-water coloring. Then I just used my glue gun to attach the googly eyes and bunny/chick appendages. What I learned: If you use a glue gun on an egg that just came out of the refrigerator, the glue will be chilled and dry before you attach whatever it is you're trying to glue to the egg. Another oops. So here is the motley crew of eggs that we ended up with.

Let's just say I am looking forward to making egg salad tomorrow.

I hope everyone had a nice Easter!

Baby Data

It's probably no surprise that I am motivated by statistics (the core of my undergraduate degree in Industrial Engineering). I really find data fascinating and eye-opening...and baby data is no different.

A lot of people will tell new moms not to "watch the clock" when feeding a newborn, stressing over naps, or counting the minutes of what seems like endless crying. Well that doesn't work for me. I NEED the data. I need to see trending to find some hope of optimism in what is a very challenging period in my life with a newborn.

There are a lot of methods out there, but I think the easiest way to track the baby data is through an app (I use Total Baby), since nowadays your phone is always within arm's reach. Most programs will keep track of when and how long your baby eats, sleeps, and needs a diaper change, along with doctor visits, milestones, and even pictures.

Here's where I've noticed the big advantage of tracking: when you use it for more than one kid. I used the app with Bugga, and I'm now using it with Bella. As I go through the daily and weekly challenges with Bella, I am finding that I very much forget exactly how things went down with Bugga. Did Bugga wake up this many times at this age? When did we move Bugga to the crib compared to Bella? And I can just look it up in seconds. There's nothing like an instant point of reference when going through all these stressful moments where you feel like you will NEVER come out the other side because this moment is just the WORST...only to see that your first child acted the same way at this age and you lived to tell the tale...or at least the data did.

Tips For Traveling With a Baby/Toddler

I need a vacation. Like, immediately. However, going on a vacation today means now managing the logistics of traveling with TWO children. As I'm trying to wrap my head around how to possibly climb this mountain, I thought I'd offer my advice on how to travel with one child under the age of two. Bugga traveled almost 25,000 air miles in her first year of life, and many of those miles included family vacations (we also moved to Alaska for a bit so those miles are a chunk of her total). Either way, we got to be seasoned parent travelers and lived to tell the tale.

Here's how we did it:
1.) Always bring a stroller. You will need this at some point. Even if you are totally into the baby-wearing thing (bring your sling too!) - the stroller carries both your child, and all of your child-related STUFF. And your stuff. And lunch to go in the airport. You get my point. When Bugga was still in the baby bucket we used this stroller, which I cannot recommend enough. You can even open and close it with one hand and it has a huge basket. When she was no longer in the bucket we used this stroller, which comes with a travel bag (for checking) and is still in great condition now after 1.5 years of a LOT of airports.

2.) Always bring a car seat. Sure you can get away with not bringing a car seat. But if you are traveling anywhere other than New York City or somewhere similar (and then plan to limit your transportation to subway or foot) your child should be strapped into their car seat. No, you won't get arrested for trying to get into a cab with an infant without a car seat, but if you get in an accident (and you KNOW how the cabbies drive) you will regret it. There are car seats on the market that double as strollers. Or you can get a backpack to carry the car seat in while you go through the airport (if baby isn't in the bucket already). Make sure you have a cover either way so the seat isn't nasty if you end up gate checking it.

3.) If traveling by plane, check your baby gear at the gate, NOT at check-in. Yep, you can check your baby items for free in both areas. Maybe you think it's a pain to drag all these things through the airport, especially if you don't have a ticketed seat for your baby and won't be using the car seat until you arrive at your destination. Doesn't matter. When you gate check these items, they are out of your sight and have a chance to be damaged by someone else for a mere MINUTES before they are put underneath the plane. Hand them over at check-in and they are out of your sight for potential HOURS that someone might drop or damage your goods in any number of ways that are undetectable to you when you pick them up at Baggage Claim. You will regret this too.

4.) Pick your flight carefully. If you are booking early enough, pick a time that coincides with the time your child sleeps. I now prefer red-eye flights with my child because I KNOW she will sleep then. We ran out of luck after awhile booking during nap time because it was just too exciting for her to sleep, and then we had NO nap. Not my preferred way to vacation. And avoid layovers whenever you can. Just GET THERE.

5.) Pick your seats on the airplane even more carefully. If your flight isn't overbooked, you might be able to avoid paying for a ticket for your baby, then find a row with an empty seat. Gate agents will even move you to a row with an empty seat if you ask nicely because they know as well as anyone that no one wants to sit next to a baby on a plane. Don't be offended - use this to your advantage. And try to get these seats next to a bathroom so you aren't waiting behind 5 other people who got there first when your kid has a loaded diaper. If your child is moving around on his own and can maybe even stand and walk, get bulkhead seats, so you have the extra space in front of you. My daughter loved to sit in her own "space" once we reached cruising altitude and didn't have to be constrained.

6.) If budget allows, book a suite at a hotel. A lot of inexpensive hotel chains nowadays have suites for great rates. It pays (in dollars and sanity) to do your research. A suite gives you the freedom to not be sitting with your spouse in the dark when your child is sleeping. And remember how much they sleep, day and night. With a suite you can essentially set your separate room up as a nursery and keep it dark, use white noise, etc.

7.) What if you can't book a suite? It happens for any number of reasons, but you can still survive. (First world problems, I know.) First, try to get a balcony. We didn't feel like forking over the hundreds of extra dollars on our Hawaii vacation with Bugga so the next best thing was a balcony where my husband and or I could hang out while the baby took naps. I spent plenty of relaxing vacation name with a book, a cocktail, and a view all while Bugga napped safely just mere feet from me in total darkness in our room.

8.) What if you can't book a suite OR a room with a balcony? Here's what you need to add to your luggage: a dark-colored, full-size (or bigger) flat bedsheet, two command hooks that can hold as much weight as possible, and a couple chip-style clips. Use these to drape over the hotel crib you stick in the corner of the room to create a dark area for your child when she sleeps. The command hooks (attach them to the wall) and clips hold up the sheet, and the hooks can be taken down later when you leave. You still need to be quiet in the room, but it's nice not to need to be in darkness. Now you and your spouse can at least watch a movie with headphones on the iPad or something. Wink, wink. Oh, and don't forget crib sheets from home.

9.) Bring a white noise machine. I mentioned it above, but this is an essential piece of kid gear in my book. Even if you don't use one at home, outside noises can be unpredictable when traveling (especially in hotel hallways) so if you can block out anything that might disrupt your child's sleep, your life is better! How many times have you been stuck in a hotel that has construction going on above or below your room?

10.) Baby's gotta eat. If your child is eating solids, don't forget to grab a banana from the breakfast buffet to have in the diaper bag later. Boxes of raisins travel well too. Kids under 3 usually eat at buffets for free, so take advantage of that. And don't forget to ask your server what the chef is able to do. We ordered plain pasta with olive oil off the menu from a higher-end Italian restaurant when we were there for their breakfast so we could have lunch ready to go later for our daughter. Oh, and bring bowls with lids to refrigerate any leftovers so you always have something. (Most hotel rooms have a refrigerator lately, I have noticed.)

I have tons of other suggestions for all parts of travel if anyone has any additional questions. Also, if anyone wants to offer up any tips for traveling with more than one kid I am ALL EARS!

Don't Bet On It

The first time Bugga met her little sister Bella

Back in December when I was nearing my due date for baby #2, I had tons of questions about the upcoming childbirth experience. I knew that if things went exactly as they had for baby #1, then I'd be thrilled (and relaxed, since I'd know what was coming). Unfortunately, outside of a scheduled c-section (and even still) childbirth is ALL about the unknown. Below are some questions I had while I waited to feel the build-up of the first contraction, and how things worked out in my case.

1. Will the baby come early/on time/late?

My first was 4 days late. They say on average that babies come earlier and earlier with each labor. However talk to ANYone who has had a baby and it seems to me the verdict is split. This baby came 6 days late. So there ya go.

2. Will I go into labor on my own?

I went into labor naturally with my first. As I was sitting around on Friday night, 5 days late, I feared I would have to be induced. Even worse, it would be scheduled for Christmas Day. I dreaded the thought of a) my toddler missing out on Christmas morning traditions the year she is finally starting to understand, and b) my poor second born would have a holiday birthday and forever hate the fact that people would always be giving her combo presents. I went into labor naturally that night, and Bella was born 6 days late, with no induction.

3. Will my labor start the same way as it did the first time?

The first time around, my contractions started as a dull pulsing at 9 AM already coming every 3 minutes, and lasting about a minute for the first hour. Then things intensified and I had the baby later that day. This time around, my contractions started around 10 PM, lasting anywhere from 30 seconds to a minute, and coming anywhere from every 5 minutes to every 30 minutes. They were all over the place. This was a bit stressful since second babies can come a lot faster than the first. So of course during these hours of initial labor I had inspriring visions of birthing this baby in our car on the way to the hospital. Totally not a cause for concern at all. Right. Anyway, these random contractions went on through the night, never building enough in intensity or frequency enough for us to feel like we needed to head to the garage until about 6 AM. And then things started to move very quickly...

4. Will it hurt more/less the second time?

So it definitely hurt the first time. I labored at home as long as I could (5 hours) and then once we made it to the hospital I was ready for my epidural. I dilated pretty fast so that was the best decision I made all day, and the baby was born 3 hours after I received the epi. This time I thought I'd entertain the thought (ha) of doing this unmedicated, figuring it might hurt less since my first baby had already blazed the path down the birth canal. Yeah, right. When I got to the hospital at 8 AM I was a whole 2 cm dilated. The nurse in triage told me to go walk around for two hours. I was disappointed, but the second my feet hit the ground from her examination, my body had other plans and I dilated three more centimeters almost instantly. And WHOA BOY did that hurt. Yep, I was the screamer in Triage. Sorry, other pregnant people in the room. This time around, however, though I asked for the epidural around the same time in my dilation progression as I did with the first baby, the nurse had a painfully hard time getting my IV in, which has to be done first. Painfully is what I mean literally, as she stuck needles up and down my hands and arms, jabbing me until she finally found one that worked. And at that point I was fully dilated. She asked if I was sure I still wanted the epidural. Oh yes, I had earned it from the IV disaster. 

5. Will it again take forever for my milk to come in, resulting in my baby having jaundice?

With Bugga, it took 4 very long days for my milk to come in. Babies are built with fat storage to cover this amount of time (along with the colostrum), but after four days the billirubin had still yet to be flushed from her system and she became jaundiced. For first-time parents, this was somewhat terrifying. We were lucky enough that Bugga did not have to spend any time in the hospital under the lights, but she did have a bilirubin blanket delivered to our home that she spent 48 hours straight wearing. She looked like a little baby glow-worm. The second time around my milk came in after two days, so though Bella's jaundice numbers climbed for a couple days, the availability of milk to help flush her system seemed to have helped her ward off the jaundice successfully.

6. How fast will I deliver my second baby?

I heard from many (many) people that their second baby came so fast that they delivered in the hallway, had no time for an epidural, and/or their spouse had to play the role of the obstetrician because they were nowhere near a hospital. So of course I entertained the thought that we'd need towels and such for the car ride just in case. I was in labor with Bugga for 11 hours, from the first contraction to seeing her little pink face. With Bella, using the same milestones, it was around 16 hours. From point of arrival to the hospital, it was about 6 hours for both.

So this is how it worked for me, and not many of my questions could have been answered with "just like the first time". It seems that each of my children are completely unique and different, and these differences start from the date of conception!

Ummm

So colic is fun...

Oh Canada...Baby!

Well, she's here! On December 21st we welcomed our little dual citizen to the family! "Bella" joined us at 2:24 PM after we patiently waited for her arrival...and she was only 6 days late! As I am sure I will be posting about her as much as her older sister, "Bugga", I'm going to continue with my little blog nicknames to have a little fun with my kiddos' names without putting them out there before they have an opinion on the topic.

Things are going great with us, and I have to say, as much as I didn't want my poor kids to have holiday birthdays, it is definitely nice to have my husband home for some extended time from work so we can navigate these crazy baby and toddler waters together until I can get my Mom act together to get back to doing this on my own during the week.

If Bella had taken much longer I was scheduled to be induced on Christmas Day, which I was NOT excited about! Fortunately she found her way out a few days prior and we were all able to spend our first Christmas in Calgary home in our cozy living room, fireplace going, snow coming down outside, and one exSTATIC 2 year old...it has definitely been a Christmas to remember!

Happy holidays to all, and I wish everyone an exciting and prosperous 2014!

Second Kid Stress

So here I am, trucking along into my 25th week of pregnancy with Baby #2. That puts us into viability range, which of course, is a nice relief of a milestone. In only a few short weeks I will be pushed over into the Third Trimester. I am starting to feel the stress of having two children creeping up on me.

I'm sure all toddler and newborn moments
 look like this, right? RIGHT?!?!

I know very well I won't be the first to do it, but I am spending more and more time lately trying to wrap my preggo-brain around the logistics of the first few days/weeks/months of my newborn's life while intermingled with my toddler's day-to-day needs. Looking back on my experiences with my first born, I think about how easy it was from my perspective now (go back and read some old posts and see how much I am rewriting history here) and if I was going to be a first-time mom again (which is impossible), I'd be SO. READY.

But that's not really the case here. As much as I know all to well how it works to have a baby, I know NOTHING about what it is like to have a baby AND A TODDLER. And my freakouts are getting a little bigger by the day.

Of course, we must plan for the hospital stay, and my toddler will not likely enjoy or understand that experience and is best left at home until the baby has arrived. This requires planning, especially since we have no family nearby, are new to our new country and therefore have a limited social network, and well, Bugga has never been away from both her parents at once for longer than an hour in her life. And though I "lucked out" last time by only being in labor during daylight hours, there's always that chance that I will need to call SOMEONE to high tail it over to the house at 2AM to watch my daughter as we go speeding off to Labor & Delivery.

Once we get home, then at least we will have a couple weeks of man-on-man coverage with both kids since my husband will be home (thanking my uterus for birthing babies during end-of-the-year holidays once again). But once I am left to my own parenting when he goes back to the office, I am trying to wrap my brain around how I will juggle two severely different nap schedules, nursing, and toddler entertainment and activities that will likely require getting out of the house. Did I mention I'll be doing this in the wintertime? In Canada? Yeah, think snow - lots and lots of snow. I'm not even going to entertain my husband's jokes about nursing outside.

What tiny advice I have obtained here and there is that baby #2 (and any baby after that, should we be crazy enough to go for more...uh....forget I typed that) will be required to be much more flexible then we ever gave baby #1 credit for. Gone will be the eerily quiet household when the baby is sleeping. Gone will be the peaceful nursing sessions in the dark in the glider. And a myriad of other things too, I'm sure.

I'm trying to collect more information on how to plan for the changes, but I'm still coming up short for my own comfort. I found an e-book (The ABC's of Baby #2) last night and devoured it at the gym today - helpful but brief. If anyone out there in internet land has any tips, or resources, I am ready!!!

Big Changes!

Okay, so if you are a reader of my blog, you might have noticed that the last couple posts have been pretty........spaced..........out. Not my finest example of my writing discipline, but I swear I have a good excuse! Well, excuses really.

For starters: We are moving to Canada. From Texas. Which at a glance did not seem like it was going to be a huge deal (other than the violently different weather, but I'm sure I'll have more posts about that later...). It turns out, it is actually QUITE a big deal because, after all, it is an entirely different country. With that comes all sorts of nightmares around customs and importing things like, I don't know, our FURNITURE and our CARS and all sorts of drama. Throw in some loonies and some toonies (yep, that would be the sophisticated name of our new country's currency) and our lives will pretty much be a-changin'. But to be fair to the Calgarians we will soon call our neighbors, everyone up there at first glance appears to be super friendly and at least I can say they have beautiful weather in the summer. I'm going to hold on to that thought as long as I can...

And then there's excuse #2. 

Our Required Facebook Announcement

I'm pregnant. Oh yes. Believe me I have wanted to type many a blog about how miserable I was during my first trimester, but since we didn't tell a SOUL until Father's Day when he hit the safety zone of the second trimester, I couldn't very well publish it all over the internet. Which I think is a total scam. Expectant moms are typically very ill during the first three months, and it just isn't fair that we aren't allowed to publicly whine about it, only because we are trying to do the responsible thing and spare our extended family and friends the grief should there be some complication or what not.

So because I had to suffer in silence (except for my husband, poor guy), you can at least forgive me for being a blog slacker. I swear I'll do better just as soon as the morning sickness cuts me a break - I swear I can see the horizon!

Listmania: Baby Registry Must Haves

Nowadays most full-time parents will register at a chain brand for baby items that will come in handy during baby's first year. I did a lot of research around the time I was 4-6 months pregnant and was focusing on the safest, most highly-recommended items by parents who had "been there, done that". Now that we have made it through our first year, here is a list of items (and recommended brands where applicable) that I could not have lived without.

$15K crib for rich kids. Not normal.

1. Pack-N-Play This item was used as Bugga's bed for the first couple months. It is portable so it can be moved from room to room easily if necessary. We selected one with a "newborn napper" feature that was a cozy bassinet-like piece that attached to the top of the item. Note - once our daughter moved to her crib for all her sleeping, we honestly didn't use this anymore, unless we were roadtripping and had space to take it with us for use in a hotel or another home.
2. Crib Once Bugga was ready for her own room, she needed somewhere to sleep, and all babies need a crib at some point. Do NOT get a dropside crib, if that even needs to be mentioned.
3. Crib Mattress Obviously required or your infant is sleeping on the wood board at the bottom of the crib, and who wants that? There are tons on the market - look for waterproof styles, and there are even eco-versions that work great.
4. Crib Slat Bumpers The standard bumpers should not ever be placed in the crib, unless you are photographing the nursery before your baby is born. It just isn't worth the suffocation risk. Or the risk your baby will get caught in it - also not good. I still don't understand why so many parents keep buying these things. Or that they're even still sold in the first place. What you might not expect as well is several months into this parenting thing your baby starts to become mobile and keeps whacking his or her head on the wood of the crib at night (ours certainly did). And then tries pulling up in the crib at 2am and REALLY whacks her head when she falls backward. That sound broke my heart and it will break yours. Slat bumpers are the best thing since sliced bread, and I wish I knew about them when I was putting my registry together so we could avoid all the head-smacking. These are safe, they look nice, and they are even cozy for your baby. Your bigger kid can't use them to climb on (like regular bumpers) and air still passes freely between them. OK off my soapbox. Get these.
5. Warming Plate Once your kiddo starts eating solids, you might be defrosting food cubes on a daily basis. If you are like me, you will often forget to take things out of the freezer the night before for thawing, and the microwave leaves hotspots that can burn your child's mouth. A warming plate like this one heats things quickly and safely.
6. Video Monitor When Bugga was born we lived in a small two-bedroom house where even when she was in her crib, she was barely 20 feet from us. We assumed a simple audio monitor would be fine. Until we tried sleep training. With an audio monitor we could not tell why she was crying - sometimes we thought she might just be upset because we had stepped out of the room for 5 minutes too long, but then we'd return to find her leg had gotten stuck between the crib slats and we didn't know until we went back into the room. Once we ordered our audio monitor, we never looked back. I still love to peek at her sleeping on the camera, and I can do this without having to go into her room to disturb her.
7. Diaper Pail There are a lot of these on the market, and they are relatively inexpensive. We have the Arm & Hammer version, but I've heard good and bad experience with every single one, so just pick one. But you DEFINITELY need something to corral the evil odor that comes with diapers.
8. Strollers You can probably survive with only one. You can even get the all-in-one travel system style that can get you easily through the first year. But those are heavy and often excessive for everyday needs. What worked for us: a Snap-and-Go style stroller that is pretty much nothing but a stroller frame that your infant carseat snaps right into. It is light, and should be able to be closed with one hand (and maybe a foot). You also need an umbrella stroller which is easy for popping out of the back of the car, or taking on airplane trips (get one with a carrying case to protect it from dirt and damage when gate checked like the Chicco Capri that we use still). We also have a jogging stroller. I wish I used that thing more. I am not a jogger, though I seriously tried when I was on maternity leave. It's just not my thing. And the stroller is pretty bulky for heaving in and out of the trunk compared to our umbrella stroller which is just as good. If you do a lot of outdoorsy stuff, then a jogger is more on the must list. But bottom line - you NEED a stroller(s).
9. Infant Car Seat Try to find one that contains your child as long as possible based on height and weight maximum capacities. Many go up to 35 pounds, but typically kiddos quickly outgrow their car seats based on their height versus their weight. By the way, don't mess around on this one. Find the safest rated car seat on the market based on Consumer Reports. There is ZERO reason not to. At the time we had our baby, the Graco SnugRide was one of the highest rated, and at 15 months Bugga has still not yet grown out of it (though we are on the verge).
10. Baby Bouncer / Swing OK the hard truth about these items is that every child is different. Some like one and not the other, and vice versa. We registered for both a bouncer and a space-age-style swing. The bouncer was a LIFESAVER while Bugga hated the swing. Well, she didn't hate it, but she certainly didn't want to be in it for more than 10 minutes, which for me is a huge fail. So that thing is taking up some serious closet space should potential baby #2 have a different opinion.
11. A great double breast pump and all the related parts If you are breastfeeding, you need a pump, and a double electric pump is the only way to go. This makes pumping quick, because you certainly don't want to spend extra time doing this if you don't have to. You can also get the battery pack and/or the car lighter adapter so you can do this anywhere that works for you. I used this one and it was fantastic for every situation I needed it in. Oh, and although I linked to the product on Amazon, I actually bought it from Baby Depot for less than $200 (vs. $270 on Amazon and Babies R Us) so definitely price shop if that is a concern for you.



Doesn't your kid need a stroller made by Aston-Martin?
No, no he does not.

12. Baby Toiletries It should be obvious, but you need all of the following in baby size: brush, comb, nail clippers, nose sucker, and thermometer. I also recommend a Nose Frida - it is disgusting, but holy crap this thing works. Don't forget shampoo, baby wash, and lotion for bath time. You might also want to have on hand Baby Tylenol, Baby Vick's Vapor Rub (for the bottoms of their feet when they are stuffed up), diaper rash cream, Little Noses saline solution (for stuffy noses), and Little Tummys gas relief drops (for gas obviously). You hopefully won't need these at all right away, but you never know, and it sucks to have to run out to the drugstore in the middle of the night.

If you are looking for some toys to add to your registry, or to have ready for their homecoming, here is a list of toys that we enjoyed in our house from birth to 8 months old.

Your Child's Milestones

I am by no means a stickler for keeping up with the Joneses as far as what my children can or cannot do compared to the next kid. That being said - er, written - I still want to know when I can expect different abilities and personality traits to appear. This also helps me to know what I can help her to learn, since she might be developmentally ready.

As I read magazine articles and websites, or talk to other moms, I will collect what I learn in this post, so I can always have it as a reference for what fun stage will come next!

0-2 Months

• Lifts head when lying on tummy (1 month)
• Responds to sound (1 month)
• Stares at faces (1 month)
• Smiles and laughs (1 month)
• Can see black & white colors very well (1 month)
• Notices hands (2 months)
• Gurgles and coos (1-2 months)
• May roll over on their own (back to tummy) if baby is on the lower side of the scale, but will likely lose this ability until closer to 4 months. (2 months)

3-4 Months

• Visually tracks moving objects (3 months)
• Recognizes your face and voice (2-3 months)
• May be able to roll over from tummy to back (3 months)
• Turns toward sounds (3 months)
• Can bat at toys (3 months)
• Can bear weight on legs (4 months)
• May cut first tooth (4 months)
• May imitate sounds (4 months)
• Can grasp toys (4 months)

5-6 Months

• Plays with hands and feet (5 months)
• Recognizes their own name (5 months)
• Can rollover both directions (6 months)
• Can sit without support (6 months)
• Ready for solid foods (6 months)
• Turns toward sounds and voices (6 months)
• Passes an object between hands (6 months)
• May start crawling (6 months)

7-8 Months

• Starts to exhibit stranger anxiety (7 months)
• Can wave goodbye (7 months) 
• Can stand while holding onto something (7 months)
• Can pull to a stand (7 months)
• Combines syllables or jabbers (7 months)
• Understands object permanence (7 months)
• Crawls (7 months)
• Can say "mama" or "dada" but not necessarily to anyone in particular (8 months)
• Points at objects (8 months)
• Cruises around furniture (8 months)
• Enjoys peek-a-boo (8 months)

9-10 Months

• Can drink from a sippy cup (9 months)
• Eats with fingers (9 months)
• Says "mama" or "dada" to the correct parent (9 months)
• Can pick things up with pincer grasp (10 months)
• Crawls very well (10 months)
• Gestures to communicate (10 months)
• Can stand alone for several seconds (10 months)
• Puts objects into containers (10 months)

10-12 Months

• Some babies can take a few steps at this point (11 months)
• Understands "no" (11 months)
• Can squat from standing position (11 months)
• May say another word besides "mama" or "dada" (11 months)
• Imitates others (12 months)
• Can say two words besides "mama" or "dada" and uses them well ("hi" or "bye") (12 months)
• Capable of going up and down stairs by themself (12 months)
• Can walk alone (12 months)

13-18 Months

• Can bend over to pick something up (13 months)
• Can hold out their arm when you are dressing them (13 months)
• Loves looking at their reflection in the mirror (13 months)
• Can roll a ball back and forth to you (13 months)
• Starts to imitate other people (14 months)
• Can point to one body part when asked (14 months)
• Can respond to basic instructions (14 months)
• Initiates games (14 months)
• Uses 3 words on a regular basis (15 months)
• Walks backward (15 months)
• Able to scribble with a crayon (15 months)
• Tries to "help" around the house (15 months)
• Can put finger to mouth and say "shhhhh!" (15 months)
• The "no"s begin! (15 months)
• Can turn book pages (16 months)
• Temper tantrums due to frustration begin (16 months)
• Becomes attached to a soft toy/blanket (16 months)
• Starts climbing on everything (16 months)
• Can stack 3 blocks (16 months)
• Starts to use a spoon/fork (16 months)
• Has learned the right way to use objects (telephone, spoon, books) (16 months)
• Can take off one piece of clothing without help (16 months)
• Switches from 2 naps to 1 nap (16 months)
• Uses 6 words regularly (17 months)
• Has fun pretending (17 months)
• Throws a ball underhand (17 months)
• Can feed a doll (17 months)
• Likes riding on toys (17 months)
• Able to speak more clearly (17 months)
• Sorts toys by shape, color, or size (17 months)
• Able to kick a ball (17 months)
• Dances to music (17 months)
• Will sit down and "read" board books alone (18 months)
• Can scribble with a crayon (18 months)
• Can create two-word phrases (18 months)
• Can stack 4 blocks (18 months)
• Brushes teeth with assistance (18 months)
• Throws a ball overhand (18 months)
• Showing signs of toilet readiness (18 months)
• Takes apart toys and puts them back together (18 months)
• Able to understand simple instructions (though will need repetition) (18 months)
• Understanding "I am my own person" - leads to running away when in public! (18 months)

19 Months - 2 years

• Able to run well (19 months)
• Understands up to 200 words (19 months)
• Recognizes errors (when you say "up" but mean "down") (19 months)
• Washes and dries hands with help (19 months)
• Takes off own clothes (20 months)
• Learns 10 or more words per day (20 months)
• Can go up stairs standing up (20 months)
• Can stack 6 blocks (21 months)
• Can name pictures in a book (21 months)
• Follows 2-step requests like "please pick up that toy and bring it to me" (22 months)
• Can do simple puzzles (22 months)
• Can draw a straight line (22 months)
• Can name several body parts (22 months)
• Can put on loose-styled clothing (22 months)
• Might be ready to transition from a crib to a bed (22 months)
• Understands opposites (22 months)
• Uses 50-70 words (23 months)
• Can open doors (23 months)
• Can sing basic tunes (23 months)
• Has interest in playing with other kids (23 months)
• Asks "why?" (23 months)
• Talks about self (likes/dislikes, wants/needs) (23 months)
• Can name 6 body parts (24 months)
• Can speak in 2-3 word phrases (24 months)
• Can go down stairs standing up (24 months)
• Can arrange items into categories (24 months)
• Learns how to jump (24 months)
• Understands gender differences (24 months)

2-3 Years

3-4 Years

• Understand how to take turns, share, and follow directions (3-4 years)

4-5 Years

• Schools expect children to recognize uppercase letters, rhyme, and describe a basic plot; (start of kindergarten)
• Should know how to count to 20 and identify simple shapes (start of kindergarten)

5-6 Years

• Learning to tell jokes, but not quite understanding the concept of a punch line (5-6 years)
• Learning to use exaggeration ("school-age")

6-7 Years

7-8 Years

• Understanding punch lines in jokes (7-8 years)
• Start requesting privacy (7-8 years)

8-9 Years

9-10 Years

10+ Years