Listmania: How to Survive Two Kids - Life with a Newborn and a Toddler

When I was pregnant with my second child, I spent a lot of time trying to wrap my head around the logistics of parenting two children at two very different stages of life. It's amazing how much a couple years between kids can mean a world of variation in needs, schedules, meals, preferences, abilities...the list goes on and on. I searched the internet trying to find advice from moms who had been there, but found there really was a shortage of practical information that I could put to use. I am starting this post 7 months into my life with two kids, and though I'm sure it is different for everyone, I think I have a perspective that can hopefully help others out there who are wondering how the heck they will get through this part of parenting. Maybe this will help...

Surviving Two Kids - Life with a Newborn and a Toddler

1. If you still have time before your second child arrives, do some preparation. I'm not talking about setting up the crib - I'm talking about sanity preparation. Start talking to your toddler about the new baby, and include terms like, "patience" and "fragile". 
2. Get your hands on as many big sibling books that you can find - we found "I'm a Big Sister" (brother version also available), as well as "Waiting For Baby" and "You and Me". These all show what life with a new baby will be like and should help immensely once the baby comes home.
3. Start stockpiling quiet toys that can be kept in special bins throughout your house. These can be used by your toddler during baby naptimes, nursing sessions, or when Mom just needs 15 minutes of silence (or almost silence anyway). Include items like books to read, crayons and coloring books, or quiet books (here's my version). To make the boxes even more exciting, only let your toddler use them when you need the quiet time.
4. Keep emergency items all over the place. I have a gallon-size ziploc in my car, my husband's car, and in my way-too-big-to-be-trendy purse. In these bags I have a will-not-be-missed change of clothes for each kid, a diaper for each kid, wipes, a disposable changing pad and a disposable diaper trash bag. At this point I do still use a diaper bag, but it stays in the car and I just pull things from it when I need too.
5. I always keep the following in my purse: A toddler-applicable snack. Stickers and crayons. An old (hopefully charged) smartphone loaded with whatever is the latest and greatest area of interest. I promise you will get caught somewhere, or need to buy some extra toddler happiness when the baby needs attention while you are running errands. A box of raisins always makes my older daughter happy when I need an extra 20 minutes to get everyone through a doctor appointment.
6. Solicit your toddler for help with the baby. This has been huge for us, and Bugga loves to feel important. Even at 2.5 she is able to bring me things like a baby blanket, a clean outfit for the baby, etc. if I just ask her. 
7. Grocery shopping with one kid was a breeze compared to two. In case you didn't learn this the first time around, your baby's car seat DOES NOT go on top of the shopping cart. Ever. And unless you are at Costco, the car seat will likely not fit inside the cart either, especially if you plan on actually shopping for anything, and definitely if your toddler is sitting in the kid seat. This is where the sling/baby carrier serves its purpose. Oh, and don't forget to park right next to the cart return.
8. Speaking of the baby carrier...that thing will come in handy a lot. I wore it all over the house. So did my husband, as for awhile that was the only place Bella would nap. (We do not miss those days AT. ALL.) I also wore it a lot outside of the house - besides shopping, it allowed me to still keep Bugga enrolled in her gymnastics class. She isn't quite old enough for a non-parented class, but I can't have the baby in the infant seat while Bugga is in class. But the sling was no big deal. And Bugga really needs that gymnastics class for a myriad of reasons, so I am so glad I did not have to suspend that from our schedule.
9. If your toddler doesn't use a sound machine, I would consider it at this point. My kids both have sound machines which are priceless tools when both at home and traveling. And now that you will have a new baby potentially screaming at all hours, a sound machine can muffle that sound so at least SOMEONE in your house can get some sleep.
10. Know that this chaotic mess of a life will not last forever. There will be tears of happiness and frustration several times over as you learn to adjust to everything. That first year of your child's life is HARD on a mom. And add a second (or third, or fourth) kid to it, and everything escalates. But your family will evolve into something that works for everyone.

*Note: For some reason I wrote this post and never published it, and I just found it now that my second child is 14 months old. I am happy to say we survived the first year (as you will) and things are definitely easier nowadays that we all know each other much better and have adjusted to life outside the womb. Hang in there!

Potty Patrol

I was in absolutely no hurry to potty train my older daughter. I have just grown to accept diapers are what they are, and honestly, diapers give me CONTROL. Seriously - I know when and where my toddler will need a diaper change (the baby, she's a little more sporadic). My friends who are parents of newly-toilet trained children are familiar with just about every public bathroom in town. Ew.

I had started collecting articles on what signs you should look for with regards to readiness, and then what to do once the training began.

Here's what these articles taught me:

1. Kids respond well to bribes. (But we knew that.)
2. There are no guaranteed signs of readiness across the board - all kids are different.
3. There are also no guaranteed methods of potty training. 

And this is how it all shook out for us:

Like I said, no rush for this milestone. It crossed my mind that she might be mature enough to handle this at 2 years old, but as I was about to have another baby, I was not about to throw this variable into our lives until I had a clue how I was going to handle two kids in general. A little after my daughter hit 2 1/2 or so, I started slowly collecting the things I thought we would need for the potty training adventure, once it started to make its appearance.

I decided from the get go we would not be dealing with the kid-size toilet. I hear of all these parents who buy these for their children after their 1st birthday and then keep it in the living room, the bedroom, the back of the car, all so the child can get "comfortable" with the concept of using the mini-potty. It's not a stuffed animal - it's a toilet. Not many of us use a toilet next to our sectional. And on top of that, I had zero interest in cleaning that thing out every time my child was successful.

No matter which route you take, your regular routine is still going to be affected, and for that you need STUFF. You will most likely need a potty training seat, as their little rear end will be liable to fall right in for many more years. Along with that is a stool to reach the toilet. I recommend either multiple stools, or make the one you have lightweight so your toddler can move it between the toilet and the sink. Depending on your bathroom, you might also need a faucet extender, a faucet handle extender, and even a light switch extender. AND depending on your house, you might need this setup in each bathroom your child could use when nature calls.

Basically, you need to think about all the steps your child will need to go through to address a bathroom urgency on their own should you be unable to assist in a split second when they have. to. GO.

So I bought a variety of potty seats (there is no easy way to tell which ones will fit the toilets in your house until you bring them home and put them on the seat) and step stools. As I type this we are a month out from our potty training, and we use one potty seat and two stools in two different bathrooms (the main guest half bath and the bathroom between my daughters' rooms). The wood stools are nice, but they are heavy and make a lot of noise. Since my daughter's toilet is on the other side of the wall from my other daughter's crib, I needed to squash all the stool moving in the middle of the night so that bathroom needed TWO STOOLS.

I also bought a folding travel potty seat (with princesses of course), several packages of underwear with Bugga's favorite characters, and even flushable wipes. Then I waited for the signs. That never really came. Her interest in the whole toileting process ebbed and flowed, and she always woke up soaked in the morning because I didn't have the heart to cut off her liquids in the evenings.

Bugga started school two days a week this year where they do not potty train, but maintain whatever you are doing. What they did start doing is sitting Bugga on a toilet three times a day, which I used as my jumping off point.

I created a chart based on the things that motivate my specific child (in Bugga's case, certain shows, apps, and movies, since she only gets these in special situations). Then I declared Labor Day Weekend as our training weekend. Our plan was to have one parent assigned to be with Bugga all day long at all times. She typically would wander around the house playing on her own but that would not work for this. I also had to be tough with my husband that we couldn't just do this in the living room (ahhh the rug!) and simultaneously watch college football as someone was sure to miss crucial signs of nature calling. 

I set up our master bathroom (it's a little over-the-top spacious, but any bathroom should work as children are little) to be All Things Toddler and put in there her easel, her Lego table, and her little play table and chairs with books, puzzles, and coloring.

Then we dove right in! On the first day (Saturday), Bugga wore nothing but a shirt all day (except training pants for naptime) so she'd have easy access to the toilet. Then we took her to it every 15 minutes with a timer, giving her a chance to go. Every time she'd successfully use the toilet she'd get a sticker on her chart (one sticker for pee, three for poop), an animal cracker, and a lot of congratulations. In between trips to the toilet, we continuously offered beverages and salty snacks to give her plenty of opportunity to learn to recognize the signs of needing to go. Her favorite way to pass the time that day was of course by having tea parties with REAL WATER. She couldn't get enough of this special turn of events and it worked just fine for me! At the end of the day, she had successfully peed on the potty well over 20 times - and with no accidents! (No sign of any poop though. And my kid is typically pretty regular...)

On Day Two Bugga got to start wearing her new undies, which she was thrilled with. We also did not confine her to the bathroom all day either and tried to get back into our regular routine. We had a couple accidents that day, which was to be expected at this point. But we still moved successfully through her chart and she spent most of the day in a chair in front of her reward shows anyway. And finally, finally after sitting for a loonnnnngggg time on the toilet on the evening of Day Two, reading books to her and keeping her busy, she finally pooped on her target after avoiding the issue for two days. Okay, and we added the incentive of a new Anna dress-up dress (from Frozen, in case you live under a rock). We did more of the same on Day Three.

The long weekend ended, and we went back to our routine as far as leaving the house for activities, school and errands. Bugga kept on with her chart, having very limited accidents. The poop thing was a bit of a struggle for awhile, as she would clearly need to go but would go back and forth between playing and sitting on the potty...and then eventually have an accident. The good thing is she did not like how this felt, and would cry, so I was optimistic we wouldn't have to deal with too much more of this.

After about a week our process evolved to incorporating "Poop Prizes". At this point, Bugga can pee on the potty successfully whenever she needs to, without any accidents. And if she poops without accident, she gets an animal cracker and to pick from a prize basket filled with more undies, books, Frozen paraphernalia, and puzzles. This method clinched her success and now she goes regularly on her own.

Ugh this was a long post. But potty training requires patience just like reading all of the above. And again, only you know your kid and what motivates him or her. If it doesn't take the first time, you can always wait and try again.

Magnetic Board Options

After my recent project creating Fabric Alphabet Magnets for my daughter, I of course needed to find a magnetic space for her to use her new magnets.

I saw this great idea on Pinterest to use an inexpensive oil drip pan that can be purchased for a low price at a local Home Depot or Lowe's. Perfect.

Except apparently in Canada they don't believe in these particular style of oil drip pans, so I hit a dead end immediately.

Then I thought, well, I'll just get a board cut to my specifications, and then use a couple various products on the market (specifically Chalk Board Paint and Magnetic Paint) and make my daughter her own customized chalkboard-magnet-board combo space. Genius.

Thankfully I did a little online researching before investing in any of the supplies needed. I found this and this which taught me two things: 1) There is a certain guy posting on every internet thread about his magnetic paint additive that is overall a pretty grouchy guy, and 2) Magnetic paint is a waste of time and energy.

OK so now what? I could buy a kid-specific magnetic board, but I really wanted something BIG and most kid magnetic boards I could find are somewhat teeny.

In the end, I went with a magnetic dry erase board (Michael's, ~$20). I will be no means be giving my 21-month-old dry erase markers anytime soon, but it works great as a clean magnetic space for her new magnets, and down the road she'll have fun with the markers.

Listmania: Parenting Ideas

This is yet another list for me to collect ideas that I will use somewhere down the road, and you are welcome to as well. As usual, please feel free to make suggestions, and if it is something I think has a place on the list, I will not only add it into the post, I will give you credit via a link back to your blog (should you have one).

Parenting Ideas

Description: Once in awhile, through all those suggestions that are thrown at you from everyone from the dry cleaner to the grandmothers, a couple gems float to the top. I want to remember how to be the best parent I can be, and I may not always remember the right idea at the right time. I hope this list helps me stay on top of my parenting game, even if just a little bit.

1. Going to the beach? Take along baby powder - it's a miracle worker with getting sand of everyone's legs and feet.
2. Bored Jar: If your child child complains of boredom, they have to pick a slip from the jar and do the activity, good or bad. It might be going for ice cream, it might be cleaning their room.
3. Leave love notes on your child's pillow when they least expect one.
4. Hug your child every day when they wake up and when they get home from school.
5. Timers set definite boundaries. For example, with a timer, you can say, "I'm setting the timer. I want your room cleaned (or your shoes on, or the dishes unloaded) in 15 minutes. If you haven't finished by then, your correction is…." This method not only spurs on easily distracted children, but it also leaves little room for arguing about a job that isn't finished and whether the correction is warranted.Say something great about your child to someone else, knowing your child can hear you (but not necessarily with your child standing right there).
6. Make fun shaped sandwiches for lunches using cookie cutters.
7. Set family rules. “Our family rule is that the room has to be clean by 5:00 each day. Either you can clean it or I will. But, anything that I find laying around will go into a box in the garage and be unavailable for the next week." If your son doesn’t have his uniform for practice, he’ll learn an important lesson when he explains to the coach why he’s not prepared. If you find that your kids don’t even miss the toys or clothes that you hauled out to the garage, that lets you know they probably have more than they need and it’s time for a big donation to Goodwill Industries. 
8. Come up with a secret word, phrase, or hand gesture that means "I love you" so you and your child can communicate without them being embarrassed in front of their friends.
9. Next time your child "forgets" to put something away, like video games or sports equipment, put it away for him. When he asks where it is, tell him that he'll just have to look for it. Believe me; he will learn that it's a lot more trouble to find something that Mom has hidden than it is to put it away in the first place.
10. Ignore phone calls during quality time, and make it clear you are choosing to be with your child instead.
11. Decorate your child's mirror with a fun surprise message.
12. Your words help your child build self-esteem. Tell her she is beautiful.  Praise specific features of her body.  Encourage her to wear clothing that makes her feel comfortable. Let her choose her hair length.  Allow her choices with clothing. Realize it's okay if clothing is sometimes wrinkled or mismatched. Be there with love and affection when someone teases her. 
13. Send your kiddo something in the mail with an actual STAMP! What could be more fun?
14. If time-outs don't work, try a "time-in." This can be accomplished by sending your child to a designated spot where he must complete a task that has a definite beginning and end. This could be putting together a small puzzle, stringing 50 beads on a piece of yarn, or tracing the alphabet. A time-in diverts his energies and encourages him to focus on something positive.
15. If your child likes to stomp off to his room or stomp around in anger, send him outside to the driveway and tell him to stomp his feet for one minute. He'll be ready to quit after about 15 seconds, but make him stomp even harder.
16. Use a WHEN-THEN routine. “WHEN your room is clean (which means I can see your entire floor and the horizontal surfaces are clear of clutter) THEN, you can have your TV time, or THEN we’ll leave or practice, or THEN you can join us for dinner.” Creating a When-Then routine in which the room must be cleaned before a more enjoyable part of the routine occurs – creates a natural incentive. If you follow a When-Then routine every single day- there’s no need to fuss or fight about it. As my mother-in-law says, it’s the law. It’s just the way we do things around here. That’s called “letting the routine be the boss” so you don’t have to be.
17. Watch what you say! Don't criticize your own body. Never make fun of the way someone else looks. Say that cosmetics make us look different or fancier not prettier.  Never say, "I wish I looked like her." Don't freak out if she gets dirty. Avoid fawning over beautiful models and actresses.
18. Lead by example: Limit access to media. Provide your daughter with dolls with dark and light skin. Don't always wear makeup. Provide healthy food to make it more likely for your child to have a healthy body. Encourage physically active play and activities. Wear a swimsuit even if you don't feel like wearing one, so you can swim with your child. Develop a social circle that expands outside your likely-homogenous neighborhood. Eat all foods in moderation.  Provide opportunities for your child to develop her unique talents. Celebrate exercise for making the heart healthy. Celebrate acts of the heart.

What else???

Listmania: Questions for Day Care Providers

Before I decided to focus on my full-time MOM.b.a., I returned to work for 5 weeks after my maternity leave, which had originally been my long-term plan. During that time, Bugga attended daycare, which I felt was the best option for us (versus having a nanny or an in-home care situation). The process for finding the right location was not at all easy. Depending on where you live, you may need to start this process very early, often before your baby is born. And even then you never know - Bugga still didn't have a spot at our first choice location at 12 weeks old (even though we got on the waitlist a month before she was born) all due to sibling prioritization. So for all the planning in advance we still had to scramble to find a backup location.

For those of you about to start this process, below is a pretty thorough list of questions to ask every facility you tour. You might not care about all the questions, but hopefully most are useful. I've even added some I wish I had asked but didn't know to looking at this in hindsight. Good luck!

Questions for Day Care Providers

General

1. What are your hours of operation?
2. What are the children's age ranges that you keep?
3. Do I need to make an appointment for a tour/question & answer?  If so, when?  Who should I talk with?
4. Is there a contract?  Do we have to pay by week or by month?  Is there a discount for paying by the month?
5. What is the price (food included)?
6. What does this price include?
7. Can I see written agreements outlining specific hours, holidays, and other breaks?
8. What are the fees?
9. Are there extra fees (such as activity fees or enrichment programs) in addition to the standard fees?
10. What is the fee if my child is picked up late by accident?
11. Is there a waiting list? How does it work? Are siblings of enrolled students given priority?
12. Is there a deposit? If so, how much? Is it refundable?
13. What are your policies on disciplining children (mainly how do they handle the bitters and others that cause problems for the remaining children - time out, discussion, isolation?)  Basically what do you do to a child that keeps biting mine and what do they tell the parents?
14. Is there a daily written report that will be sent home with my child? What does it include? How many people can you specify to have the authority to pick up my child?
15. Ask the day care about their last CPS inspection & see if their responses match the inspection.
16. What is the policy if I decide to change day cares?  Do we have to give a certain amount of notice?
17. Can I come unannounced any time of the day (prior & during to putting my baby in the program) and observe the babies and the workers?
18. What are the policies for handling any issues I may have with a worker?  (personality issues or if you see/feel something is not happening the way it should with your baby)
19. What are the rules with regards to religion?
20. At what age do you transition the children to one nap?  What if my child needs to sleep more?

Meals

21. Will you allow mothers that breast feed to bring in their own milk?  What is the process for this?  How is the milk labeled to keep it to the corresponding child?
22. Do you provide food or snacks for the children?  Is this an extra charge or is it included?  If food is provided, can I see a sample menu for the kids?  Do you provide a hot breakfast?
23. What is the feeding schedule for children?  Is it broken down by age?  How do you keep each child straight as to which ones eat solid food vs. formula, etc?
24. When my infant starts eating “people” food, can I pick and choose what he/she eats?

Facility & Staff Quality

25. In baby’s room, how secure is it?
26. Do you have a state license, registration, or certification? 
27. Can I see your contact references?
28. Do you have safety regulations and standards?  Can I see them?
29. Do you have a secure online webcam so I can watch my child while at your facility? Does it work? Can I have temporary access before enrolling to view the quality or can I see a demo?
30. Do your care providers have First Aid & Rescue Breathing Training?
31. If we decide to take our child out for a family vacation or some reason, do we pay for the week or time the child is gone?  Do we partially pay? 
32. What is the hiring process for your employees?
33. Do you have a list of your employee’s experience, education, and training related to our child's age?
34. Do all lead caregivers and program directors have a child development background and a college degree?
35. What is your staff turnover rate?
36. How many different teachers will be interacting with my child?
37. May I contact staff references?

Programming

37. Will your facility be able to keep up with our active child? Is your group facility equipped to handle infants?
38. What are the types of activities and educational programs offered?
39. What is the learning curriculum?
40. Is there a parents group or program?
41. What are the activities for kids?  Do you take the children outside? At what ages?  Do the older children go on field trips?
42. May I participate in program planning?
43. What is your child to staff ratio and total group size? (Compare this to state required ratio.) Is this throughout the entire day (drop off, daytime, pick up)?
44. What is the maximum number of children that can be in the room with my child at one time?

Cleanliness

45. What is the changing schedule?
46. How is potty training handled?
47. What is your policy on sick children?  Do you allow other children in the room?
48. What is your policy on giving kids medicines?  Does this require a note from doctor?
49. How often do you clean & disinfect?  Toys? Floors mopped?
50. Does the facility have a pest control contract and what provisions are taken for the baby room? (spraying in corners and on floor not a good thing of course)
51. Do people walk in with shoes in baby’s room?  Are booties or shoes off required?
52. How do you handle storage of needed materials for each child?  Is the stuff labeled properly with my child’s information?  Do they have a place where all of my child’s items are always stored?
53. Does the baby room have a baby bed designated for each baby?
54. Will you let us bring in the infant carseat to be stored until other parent picks child up?

Other factors to consider:

• cost of gas, location, traffic 
• extra food and utility expenses for a care provider that comes to your home 
• whether the hours correspond well with your schedule.

* Small and large family child care operations should be licensed by the National Association for Family Child Care (NAFCC). For detailed information on state child care licensing, see the following web site: http://nrc.uchsc.edu/states.html.

Listmania!

I have a bit of an obsession with lists. When it's a to-do list, there is the feeling you get when you cross something off - I love feeling productive. Lately I feel like I need a place to keep a couple more lists, and I think this blog is a great place for them. I can share them with the world so that perhaps someone else can benefit from these lists, and even contribute to them.

I find a lot of ideas all over the place, and though they may not be immediately relevant, I will want that idea someday. Magazines, web pages, suggestions from friends, PINTEREST (duh)...I need a place to keep it all so I can find it later. So as they become relevant, I will create constantly growing lists of parenting ideas, reminders, kid activities, quotes, recipes - whatever. Oh! Also, if you have something to add that is awesome and relevant to said list, post a comment and I'll add it to the list and give you credit, with a link back to your blog. Check out the label cloud in the sidebar for "lists" and see what I have going...

May Successes

• 5/1: Bugga is sitting quite well on her own now and I am SO proud! Not bad for 5.5 months!
• 5/2: Today Bugga took a nap ON HER STOMACH. Up until this point we had rigged up a blanket system in her crib that kept her from rolling onto her belly since once there, she would cry in frustration.
• 5/3: Vacuumed the dust off of the ceiling fans. Uh yeah, this is a success.
• 5/4: The baby is rolling back to front repeatedly like a little wind-up toy. She is getting so strong. Actually have all the ingredients for a Cinco de Mayo feast of champions for tomorrow - Corona Light included (gotta watch those calories you know).
• 5/5: (bonus weekend inclusion) We have dropped the use of the pacifier at night and last night Bugga slept from 9:50pm until 7:52am - with only 3 minutes of crying at 6:02am! Typically we'd have jumped right up to get in there and provide the pacifier, but we waited to see what she'd do and she was back off to sleep in no time!
• 5/6: Off
• 5/7: My birthday was today, so I promised myself a gift of no baby stress, which I accomplished. Our big success? Getting a night out with my husband for a grown-ups-only dinner, while Bugga spent the time with friends of ours. It was actually easier than I thought it would be!
• 5/8: Today Bugga napped for a solid 2 hours!!! Nevermind that it was on my lap...at least my email account is a lot cleaner. 
• 5/9: Baby got up way too early for my preference today which really started our day off on the wrong foot...but she then took TWO naps for almost 4 hours of daytime sleep, which is unheard of in this house.
• 5/10: Decent napping again, which allowed me to straighten up the house enough to be presentable. Since we just gave our landlord notice we will not be renewing our lease (we bought a house!), he is bringing potential tenants through this evening. Don't get me started how inconvenient that timing is, but whatever.
• 5/11: My husband worked from home today, and with Mother's Day this weekend, took Bugga off for some "errands" with him so I could sleep. Love him. Relationship success for sure.
• 5/12: Off
• 5/13: Mother's Day - SO off. (Happy Mother's Day everyone!)
• 5/14: Kicked Monday's BEhind! Hit up Whole Foods for organic vegetables to make for Bugga's first foods (avocado, butternut squash, and sweet potato), she catnapped her way through the day but still logged over 2 hours (which is a success in my book), and I even found time to do the dishes, straighten my bedroom, and...wait for it...WORK! OUT! WORKOUT! I actually got on the elliptical today while Bugga exersauced on the new exersaucer. Record day. Especially for a Monday. 
• 5/15: Must have been tired from the workout - can't remember!
• 5/16: Worked out again! That is TWICE in one week. Sigh. That used to be no big deal.
• 5/17: This one seems to have fallen off the radar...
• 5/18: Closed on our new house today! TOTAL success!
• 5/19-20: OFF
• 5/21: Hmmm. Today my success is that I got out of bed today. And only because I had to. Yep, it was that kind of day.
• 5/22: Another tough one. Made an attempt at sleep training naps this week in case it wasn't obvious. Oh! Bought a lot of great fruits and veggies at the grocery store today to get my diet turned around already.
• 5/23: After a really rough night (thank you, nap issues) Bugga and I still woke up with best intentions and survived the day together!
• 5/24: Really enjoyed today with my daughter. She is smiling at everything and I love watching the joy in her face as she figures out she needs to learn how to go forward instead of backward when she wants that toy in front of her.
• 5/25:
• 5/26:

Success Story

When I was in the professional world, every role I had involved some sort of an annual review to track my performance in that position. So now, as I stay at home, I am no longer required to document such accomplishments, however I still feel I can benefit from seeing all that I have accomplished on a regular basis.

I would like to start tracking what I feel are my successes for each day "on the job" at home with my daughter. These will likely be random things that might not seem like a big deal to outsiders, but might be something I have struggled to find time for while raising a newborn. 

Maybe this will be something that will give you an idea for tracking your successes to help make the transition to being a stay at home parent even more rewarding!

I will start with the month of May, and try to do this every weekday (at least!)...

Keeping a Schedule

I read on various blogs before I left my job that the most important thing about staying at home with your kids is to create a schedule. A schedule gives you purpose, helps you feel accomplished at the end of the day when the house might still be a mess, and helps you fit in everything you want to do with your child(ren). And since you are your own boss, if you disregard your schedule for a day, so be it.

This seemed genius to me so off I went, building what I thought would work for us into Excel, color-coding all the fun we’d be having. I feel that the best method for this schedule building is to color-code by category. This way things can be interchanged when needed for the most part (varying by time needed for each). I also recognize that this is a living document and it is subject to change permanently on a regular basis as my daughter needs different things, and hopefully as I become more efficient with my time.

Below is an example of where I started. Note that it is pretty general. The feeding schedule works for my 4.5 month old who is not yet eating solids (and STILL needs an hour to eat). The nap schedule would ideally work, but, well, we are still working on that. What isn’t included here is meal planning for the following week (done on the weekend), and what happens around the time my husband gets home from work, but my daughter typically gets a bath, eats one more time, and heads to bed.

At the very least, I have a “focus” room in the house each day, where even if Bugga never gets her naps (and right now this is often) I still pass through the room of honor repeatedly and “tidy on the go” so that at least I feel like I got something done that day. 

I welcome any other tips that can be generally useful for getting through the day feeling accomplished!

One Week In

Well, I was assuming that my first report of stay-at-home-mom-ing would be full of all sorts of great experiences now that my daughter and I can have endless quality time together. Boy was I wrong! My little one had different ideas...

About a week before I left work she suddenly started napping wonderfully in her crib for about 4 hours a day. A glorious thing since previously we had only known a 30-minute cat nap here and there. So with the knowledge that routines are power for babies, I tried to continue this.

She wasn’t having it, and we know who’s boss. I think Bugga took about 2 hours of naps ALL WEEK my first week on the job. Which all you in-the-know parents realize makes for a nice family nightmare of crying and crankiness – from both of us. Somehow she still slept pretty well at night, so I should consider myself lucky (which I do everyday, but I digress...).

So lessons learned Week One: We don’t have to wean from the pacifier just yet, naps in the bouncer are perfectly acceptable, and a perfectly-timed errand that allows for car seat napping is not (yet) a crutch for baby sleep.

Oh, and incidentally, Bugga decided to roll over back to front on Friday evening – perfectly timed for me to still feel successful for the week, and Daddy was home from work to see it.